Nonsense. Crankiness in old age is not, and never has been, gender-dependent. I could apply all of your complaints about your husband to my wife, who—like him—can be a grumpy pain in the ass (as I myself can, I’m sure!) from time to time. But this has nothing at all to do with innate gender traits or gender privilege. It’s perfectly natural, as a consequence of gradual loss of health, energy, and mental sharpness. So deal with it! Old age can also be a delightful time if you keep your sense of humor, cultivate curiosity, and stop blaming your spouse for being ill-tempered now and then!